Random Talk

[Polident]

Respectfully, you’re overthinking all this. Make a profile. Swipe for a bit. Don’t think about it the rest of the day or week. If something happens, it does. If it doesn’t, it’s no big deal.

[BIONIC]

Respectfully, you’re overthinking all this. Make a profile. Swipe for a bit. Don’t think about it the rest of the day or week. If something happens, it does. If it doesn’t, it’s no big deal.

No. Keep digging, Nintex

[Potato]

These apps sound like a fucking nightmare scenario. 

Join some social clubs, meet people in real life outside of work, socialise for an hour at a bar close to your workplace and get to know the regulars/other workers in the area.

[Nintex]

These apps sound like a fucking nightmare scenario. 

Join some social clubs, meet people in real life outside of work, socialise for an hour at a bar close to your workplace and get to know the regulars/other workers in the area.

Also in the cards.

Not sure about these apps being a nightmare scenario if you can see through the machinations, it worked for 2 of my co-workers.

It takes a while to get a match you like though, same as IRL I suppose.
In the meantime I'm out and about too and having thought about what type of girl/relationship etc. I want certainly will make it easier to pick the places and events to visit.

[Nintex]

After adding some romance I got matched on Bumble, solid 7, perhaps closer to an 8 in some ways.
Fumbled it on the first chat message and she unmatched, it was clearly not good enough. I also didn't realize that it wasn't a back and forth 'chat' that opened, but really just 1 message you can send and then she has to respond within 24 hours.

I think my humor was too dark too soon, although I did add my intention that I wanted to take her out.

She had on her profile that she liked self deprecating jokes, functioned without coffee and she enjoyed watching dashcam videos as a guilty pleasure. Her opening question was:
"What do you look forward to"

So I replied with:
"I look forward to not drinking coffee and crashing my car so you can add it to your dashcam video collection. But let's go have dinner first "
Stupid, because this is the moment I should've been ROMANTIC and not a funny man (but they throw me off because they say they want humor) .

Most of these girls have the same openings, so I need to research and workshop some good ones to get the chat rolling.
But I have to persuade them to date with the romance and leave the jokes for the date itself.

Spoiler:  (click to show)(click to hide)

I also forgot to add a pic of myself with the first message, someone told me that is very important to show you're not a bot or pretending to be someone else.
Plus she told me that a lot of the girls on these apps are deep down a bit insecure too because they too have to rely on them so if you lean into their profile too much they might think you are making fun of them.

But if that's the kind of cute nerd I'm pulling from the bumble gacha machine within a week, I'm not dissapointed at all.

Out of the 3 matches so far, this was definitely the best one and shows that I don't really have to lower my standards but I do have to be less of an idiot

[BIONIC]

The best way to show them you’re not a bot is to send a dick pic as the first reply. Works everytime.

[Potato]

She's got the crazy eyes. You dodged a bullet.

[Nintex]

She's got the crazy eyes. You dodged a bullet.

She does, doesn't she.

I'm fully aware that the 30+ dating pool will carry around some kind of 'luggage' as we say here. You just have to figure out what it is and if you can live with it. 

[Potato]

Yeah man, she's got a skin suit in the basement made from her former dates.

She also believes in astrology.

[Nintex]

We have a new development that Bionic is going to like because I've changed my approach to Bumble (Hinge is a story for another time)

My target was basically 2 dating intentions: Long term relationships and lifepartner, I didn't quite get what the latter was but it isn't what I was looking for.
Single moms, high class girls being put up or putting themselves up for 'auction', religious types standing between their parents on the farm looking to marry and other such things. 

I noticed some girls in this pool had casual dates as their intention as well as a long term thing in the sense of lets start dating and see if it works out (which to me makes more sense than jumping head first in a long term thing with crazy eyes). So I replaced life partner with casual dates and the flood gates opened with new profiles to explore. Obviously also some crazy ones, for example a girl looking for a 90 year old guy with severe heart problems and a big bank account.    

I also now better understand how they use these profiles because the lifepartner profiles and hinge kind of threw me off. These are basically the 'party tricks', like the thing you do when you try to get the attention of somebody at a party after you think you'd do him/her. Be it your silly immitation of Ahnuld or your dream to travel the world one day. "I can beat you at Mario Kart" is one I have seen 100x. They're basically just copy pasting these.

And here is one that Cauliflower will enjoy. Because I've been thinking about that comment: "Why limit yourself by age" and the reason is really that I've always done that. I had an arbritary rule for example that I wouldn't mess around with the interns in my 20's even if one chased me all the way to the parking lot to see if she could change my mind because her tinder dates weren't working out. I also had the rule not to mess around with clients but again this is mostly nonsense because most of the people I talk to aren't really the 'client' anyway just someone working in the communication or marketing department and they are often contractors or switch jobs on a whim. 

Now that I'm back into the dating game, I can't change these women(do I even want to?) and I can't change society but I have changed and I'm more indifferent and less judgemental to what they're doing(or who). And the boys available to them are even more worthless than my generation was. I interact with these guys or rather don't because 90% can't look at you, let alone make eye contact. They get their haircuts from Fortnite, they have no interest in anything and they can barely finish a sentence and many are trans/queer/bi/pan or whatever.

The girls are all legal adults, they can set their own limits and decide to like me if they want. So the age limit is gone. As well as liking within my league. Because why settle for mid 7's and not aim higher. They've put themselves on the app anyway. It is what it is, we all play by the same rules.

The only thing I potentially lose are the religious types and 'lifepartner' sort but that wasn't my thing anyway and probably 5% of what is out there. Whatever the girl I pull from the remaining 95% of the pool that decides to stick around confesses to when it gets "serious" is probably way more shocking than anything I've ever done.

[EaldNarche]

I met my significant other on FF14 so I can't give anyone advice. :v But Nosferatu was really good. Maybe take her out on a date to see that?

[Nintex]

Well your advice could be, just play FF14 bro  

I'm curious though, how old were you, how did you 2 end up on the same server and how did you go from playing the game to taking it into the real world.

[EaldNarche]

Well your advice could be, just play FF14 bro  

I'm curious though, how old were you, how did you 2 end up on the same server and how did you go from playing the game to taking it into the real world.

We just happened to end up in the same server and free company and bonded over similar interests. We were both catboys. :v Eventually we figured out we lived only an hour apart from each other so we met up to get coffee and just went from there. I'm not sure how common that is, I might have just got really lucky. We've been together 5, going on 6 years now, so I was around 25 when we started dating. He's one year younger than me.

[Nintex]

That sounds great. Especially how you lucked out with the location. I know of stories like these but usually it's a distant relationship that doesn't pan out.

I've now also created a Tinder and I'm seeing quite a few of the same girls pretending to be 'high value' on Hinge and Bumble partying it up on this one. 
Travel agent my ass, she was just a local waitress on holiday in a Turkish resort pretending.  

Also Tinder is where I can be picky, because damn some of these girls are so basic.

My active combo is going to be Bumble and Tinder. The Hinge I'll keep around until it expires.

Tinder overall just seems better designed than the other apps. There is curated lists for interests like gaming and music styles and whatnot and not just a single list to swipe through.
It also immediately shows if anything on your profile matches with the other person or if there is a significant difference (open to having kids for example).

[Cauliflower Of Love]

So I have this little 4 inline car, that's pretty peppy to drive, at least to me. Reviews call it sluggish and slow and all that shit.

Anyways, it has a "turbo" mode which is basically just the engine running at full output. I rarely use it, and I did today.

Man was this fun. I'm not proud about it, but I was teasing with a masarati along the highway. I know they could out run me.

IF the road was clear, but this person was such a shitty driver I left them in the dust. 

I would kill myself with an actual fast car. 

[Nintex]

Those type of small cars can be very fun to drive.

I'm still very happy with my Mitsubshi Lancer Sports Sedan. Just a matter of putting the key in, turning it and VROOM.
There is nothing that can break about this car and the accelaration is just crazy for this class.

I usually have to keep a bit more distance at traffic lights because all the eco/60hp cars that are the norm here can't launch from a standstill like I can. 
If I fully hit the gas, my wheels spin and people get scared. 

[Cauliflower Of Love]

I have to replace the shocks and because it was a low qty car to begin with, the only parts I can find are tuner parts

and I'm like

maybe?

[Polident]

That sounds great. Especially how you lucked out with the location. I know of stories like these but usually it's a distant relationship that doesn't pan out.

I've now also created a Tinder and I'm seeing quite a few of the same girls pretending to be 'high value' on Hinge and Bumble partying it up on this one. 
Travel agent my ass, she was just a local waitress on holiday in a Turkish resort pretending.  

Also Tinder is where I can be picky, because damn some of these girls are so basic.

My active combo is going to be Bumble and Tinder. The Hinge I'll keep around until it expires.

Tinder overall just seems better designed than the other apps. There is curated lists for interests like gaming and music styles and whatnot and not just a single list to swipe through.
It also immediately shows if anything on your profile matches with the other person or if there is a significant difference (open to having kids for example).

For clarification, are you paying for these apps?

[Nintex]

They are basically useless if you don't pay, because you can't see who likes you or respond in the free tier and the search is very limited. With free there is also limits on number of likes. Plus to stand out among the crowd you need some 'super likes' because the girls are already swamped with regular likes. There is also 'boosts' that put your profile higher in the deck for a limited time.

I picked the cheapest subscription level for each. Hinge was the most expensive at $50 for 3 months, Tinder the cheapest at $25. 

It helps that Tinder looks cheap and fun, almost like a free flash game or whatever. Especially Hinge really throws you off with an high end look, which makes everything look very exclusive and you have to scroll to see the other pictures. On Tinder you can just click through the pictures and optionally open up the profile.

But yeah all the girls pretending to be into kite surfing, horse riding, city trips and what not on Hinge are really just Netflix binging on Tinder. 

[Polident]

Makes sense, in a way. But the business model depends on not finding a lasting relationship? Reading up on it briefly, the highest tier of tinder lets you hide age and location… that just seems off putting.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

I think the business model depends on scanning people to train their metrics they sell to Target.

[Nintex]

I think the statistics show that women pass on 90% - 95% of the men.
While men pass on about 50% of the women.

On the female side 6's, 7's or 8's still have a decent chance that 9/10 or 10/10 chads will date them (be it for a pump a dump) so unless it's their type or something else changes their mind, a lot of the women will ignore 95% of the guys that want to date them. And for 9/10 and 10/10 chads monogamy isn't a thing, they just order girls on tinder like take-out. Cute Asian today, German expat tommorow, quiet cat girl on friday. And for 7's on the app it's kind of difficult to resist just like it would be difficult for a guy if a 10/10 girl likes them. And age doesn't matter either, if the guy is hot at 45 he's hot and a 20 year old girl wants him.

But this is no different in my experience from clubbing or anything else. There too 90% of the women flock to the 1 or 2 chads as a harem and ignore all the other guys.
It just is what it is. If it wasn't for my fancy office, my co-workers all vouching for me, my executive role and intelligence, the just about 7 redhead wouldn't have rejected with "oh Nintex you are so charming, thanks for the effort but I didn't feel the same connection, I hope we can keep working together" she would've rejected me with: "eewwww creep" or something like that. 

Right now my best bet is to become an 8/10 in general. Lift more, be more active, be more succesful and while I think my Mitsibushi is nice a red Tesla would probably yield more success, I might also have to consider a hair transplant. At 8, I should easily get 6's and 7's would be interested. At 7 I have to be really lucky with other 7's and even 6's or 5's and only 4's and lower are a sure bet.

Out and about it would change things too, unless they need something from me or want to sell me something the 8's, 9's, 10's and even some 7's just flat out ignore me. They basically act like I don't exist. The 5's, 6's and lower 7's are now nice to me and they certainly weren't when I was still in that range myself. It can be funny in corpo environments though, I went to the visitor center of one of the biggest Dutch companies as a 6 and there is all these 9's and 10's in the lobby looking at me like: "What's this guy doing here?". One guy even came up to me with the "are you even supposed to be here" question? Next a member of the board came down the escalator, ignored everyone else and walked straight up to me, shook my hand, thanked me that I had taken time from my busy schedule to meet and said she had to run a few errands before our meeting. And before I knew it, everyone was looking at me like "Who the hell is this guy?" trying to strike up conversation, flirting and offering me all sorts of things. 

In some ways I don't like being in the rat race with the other 7's but I'm wired to be competitive. A friend of mine is a 4 perhaps even a 3 because he's so fat he can barely fit in his car. But he easily found another 3 to settle with.

[HardcoreRetro]

she would've rejected me with: "eewwww creep" or something like that. 

You should show em this massive screed above where you give all the girls a metacritic score. That'll surely make them think you're a cool and handsome chad.

[Nintex]

she would've rejected me with: "eewwww creep" or something like that. 

You should show em this massive screed above where you give all the girls a metacritic score. That'll surely make them think you're a cool and handsome chad.

She's pretty direct and cold about these things to be honest and all about numbers and statistics, I think she'd agree overall. She basically told me the same thing when she talked about not being able to get 'fun dates' anymore on the apps the first time we met. Thing is she gained some weight and she passed 30. So the guys looking for fun dates with college girls lost interest but I wasn't going to break that to her the first time we met. It's also one of the reasons why I was so excited that I felt something for her because it was without the need for apps and I specifically mentioned that in my message to her as well. I knew the rules of the Tinder game before I started and I would rather have skipped it. 

A lot of millenial women are complaining about this on X and other social media platforms. They were hot shit before and their phones were buzzing and exploding with notifications and suddenly the hot guys aren't interested anymore or even 'break up' the fwb arrangements. Some think this is about the 'ability to have kids' but the reason is simple, these guys have their age limit set to max 30 and there is plenty of other girls they can get below 30, so why bother changing the search filter? And in some ways the girls understand it but they all think it will happen to all the other girls but not to them. Same as it works in Hollywood and even the porn industry for the female talent.

The real trap of Tinder for women is that they don't find a relationship but basically go from hook up to hook up for years until they're burned out or too old.

That's one advantage men have. Lots of women will date men that are older but rarely will men date women that are older.
When I first started Tinder it defaults to 20 - 40, so I got swamped with likes from 40 year old women.

[Cauliflower Of Love]

Happy New Year

Thanks alot guys.



Take that heartfelt or sarcastically as you please.

[Nintex]

Happy New Year!!

I see my drunk posting after a bottle of champagne wasn't that bad

[Potato]

Post hog

[Cauliflower Of Love]

dualingo vs rosetta stone?

or something better?

[Uncle]

do you think moviemaking hasn't really changed since the 90s?

I remember being a kid and it was always extremely obvious when I was watching something old, the quality of the image, the quality of the recording, the style of scriptwriting, the style of editing, the pacing, the types of shots they would include

it was like they had no confidence in the audience's ability to understand how people get from one location to another so there were constant driving scenes showing people parking and getting out of cars and going through doors, just fully wasted time

and lots of "talking heads," pure dialogue without artistry, lots of tell-don't-show

it feels to me like the 90s were a breakpoint where we figured out a formula and haven't deviated that much since

have things evened out, or am I just unable to have that perspective because I've seen all of it the whole time?

if you show a kid Home Alone today, will they just instantly know "wow this is super old" - not just due to the technology and lack of cell phones, since period pieces are still made today, but due to vague qualities in the filmmaking

what about Lord of the Rings, which is now "super old," as old as movies from the 60s and 70s when we were kids

does it feel old?

[Polident]

dualingo vs rosetta stone?

or something better?

Depends on the language. LingoDeer is (or was?) a better Duolingo for the daily app game system. Pimsleur, I’ve heard about it and I think it’s the daily audio follow along type.