Journal of Other Forum Analysis (Volume II, Issue 1)

[benji]

Another fun day on Resetera

I'm dying alone.

I'm having to accept that there is no one out there, period. No friends, and certainly not the idea of ANYTHING more. The idea of going out with someone is setting my standards too high, and this is before questioning if i even like someone's existence.

I've spent the last few years focusing on my business/career to keep a roof over my head, and I've tried dating on the side. Sadly I'm fucking ugly, so that kills a lot of options for me. The most I can get is being stood up for sushi.

It's defeating to know that, even at my best, no matter what, i'm worthless. My whole life is utterly meaningless. At this point, the idea of being stabbed and bleeding out is a much happier version of the rest of my life than whatever toxic optimism anyone can provide. The next time I have to hear anyone lie and tell anyone that "there's someone out there for you" or "you have so much to live for", that's an automatic punch to the face.

I'm just tired with nowhere else to turn with no solutions and coming to realize suicide is the only effective one

https://www.resetera.com/threads/dying-alone.1132800/

You're lying.

What you're saying here is that your life is meaningless and you're worthless if you can't have someone but that's the sole condition you're establishing. It's not toxic optimism to say that your life is meaningless which is why it's on you to give it meaning in the first place. You've just limited the meaning to having someone to fuck and spend time with. And if you can't have that, possibly the lowest standard for a human life anyone can have, then you might as well unalive yourself.

And you're right. If that's all you want from life then it's probably worth just skipping to the ending since you don't want to give it any meaning beyond mandating that someone else give it meaning simply by existing for your use.

But you didn't want me to tell you you're right, you wanted the opposite but you were lying to try and fish for compliments and telling you you're wrong so you can reject them and say it's everyone else's fault for not giving your life meaning. Confirming the problem exactly as you wanted. Sorry, be the change the you seek.